For so long, I thought taking time for myself meant I was taking it away from my daughter, from my work, from everything else that needed me. Sound familiar?
I’m Brazilian, and in our culture — beautiful as it is — mothers are expected to pour from an empty cup and smile while doing it. I did that for years. Until I couldn’t.
The moment everything shifted
It wasn’t a dramatic breakdown. It was a quiet Tuesday morning when I realized I couldn’t remember the last time I had done something just for me. Not for Juju. Not for work. Just for me.
That was the beginning of a different kind of journey — one that’s still happening, one that I’ll never stop learning from.
Self-care is not indulgence. It’s maintenance. And you cannot pour from an empty cup.
What I learned
Taking care of yourself doesn’t mean neglecting the people you love. It means showing up for them with more presence, more patience, and more love — because you actually have some left to give.
Here are a few things that have helped me:
- Morning quiet time — even 10 minutes before everyone wakes up
- Moving my body — not to look a certain way, but to feel alive
- Saying no without a lengthy explanation
- Talking to a therapist — the single best thing I’ve ever done for myself
You deserve to be on your own list
If you’re reading this and you recognize yourself in these words — please hear me: you are not selfish for needing rest. You are not selfish for having desires of your own. You are human, and you deserve to be cared for too.
Start small. One thing. Today.
With love, Talita
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